(feat. natalie portman)
[i] we’re sitting here today with film star natalie portman
[i] so natalie, tell us what a day in the life of natalie portman is like?
[n] do you really want to know?
[i] please tell us
i don’t sleep motherf*cker off that ‘gnac and the durban
doing 120 getting head while i’m swerving
(d*mn natalie, you a crazy chick)
yo, shut the f*ck up and suck my d*ck
i’m busting dudes valves like gushers motherf*cker
pull up to nbc and smack the sh*t outta jeff zucker
what you want natalie? (to drink and fight!)
what you need natalie? (to f*ck all night!)
don’t test me when i’m crazy off that airplane group
put my foot down your throat ’til your sh*t’s in my shoe
leave you screaming, pay for my dry-cleaning
f*ck your man it’s my name that he’s screaming!
[i] i’m sorry natalie, are we to believe that you condone driving while intoxicated?
[n] i never said that i was a role model
[i] but, what about the kids that look up to you?
[i] do you have a message for them?
all the kids looking up to me can suck my d*ck
it’s portman motherf*cker, drink ’til i’m sick
slit your throat and pour nitrous down the hole
watch you laugh and cry; while i laugh, you die
and to all the dudes, you know i’m talking to you
(we love you natalie!) i wanna f*ck you too!
(p!) it’s for portman! (hey!) it’s for p*ss*es!
i’ll kill your f*cking dog for fun, so don’t push me
[i] well natalie, i’m surprised, all this coming from a harvard graduate?
[n] well, there’s a lot you may not know about me
[i] really, such as?
when i was in harvard i smoked weed everyday
i cheated every test and snorted all the yay
i gotta def posse, you gotta lot of dudes
i sit right down on your face and take a sh*t
[the lonely island]
natalie, you are a bad *ss b*tch (h*ll yeah!)
and i’ll always pay for your dry-cleaning
when my sh*t gets in your shoe (what!) as for the drug use
well i can’t vouch for that, my d*ck is scared of you (ooh)
[i] natalie, one final question
[i] if you could steal a smooch from any guy in hollywood who would it?
[n] no more questions