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apropos of legacy - 0ts lyrics

when my love is in hand, i’m guided towards the light
slide my fingers ‘cross the keyboard
and bring these melodies to life

though the outputs are heard, they are filled with the sting of strife
and i can’t help but wonder if those works
are your favorite works of mine…

should i plan to be alive beyond tomorrow?
is it right to feel bereavement for an imaginary face?
is a legacy a fable, a part of make believe?
will my legacy bе featureless
a shadow cast from sun through lеaves?

no matter if i write a million songs about my pain
or if i spend a million hours sinking deep into my shame
not a thing could change the future anyway
not a thing could change the outcome
or the day i leave this mortal plane

i will catalog and compile the things i can and can’t control
a constant rush of cortisol compounds and drowns out all i know
for every single day that passes, i feel a little less at home
i wanna run away from everything so i’ll never be alone

oh, i’m so scared that one day soon i’ll wake to find out that you’ve died
and i’ll have to wonder what you thought of as you fell from shattered skies
i don’t want to face uncertainty, i want you in my life
maybe if i’d have loved you a little sooner, you would want to stay alive
i knew the feeling of your hand entwined in mine
i felt the shaking in your chest
i saw the smile that didn’t seem to reach your eyes

i couldn’t let go of being your knight
because my love was so much bigger
than the force that grazed the trigger

i just wanna keep you upright, i would fall right to my knees
i’m poetic, i’m pathetic, i’m verbose beyond belief
and i wanna hear you laughing with me
but i don’t know if i can reach you anymore

god, i’m so tired of being admired
you think i’m more than red on skin
i’ve crossed the line a thousand times
to stay beyond the man i’ve been

but still i want to find a way
to pull you through another day
so i don’t wanna lose my spark
to write again tonight

can this world make up its mind?
am i getting close to the end?
will this worrying be something i remember on my deathbed?
oh, there’s nothing i can do
except accept and love again!
i will harvest this bitter lime
to love again tonight!

when we were hand in hand
i knew that things could be alright
but our fates were tilted at different angles

when i reached my hand to the light in your window
i couldn’t feel you at all

- 0ts lyrics

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