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pay me in stolen treasure - b.a.johnston lyrics

i don’t wanna deep fry this sh*t no more
cuz sooner or later i’ll deep fry my hand
when i’m tired and hungover and i don’t know where i am
next thing you know, today’s special:
b.a. johnston’s deep fried hand
served with a side of rice for four ninety*five
no thanks

so long john silver i got something for you
to read and then later on peruse
and then sign me up
sign me up for your crew
and i don’t mean the crew in your lame american fast food fish and chip chain
they call deep fried chicken “chicken planks”
how lame
and i don’t care if i get scurvy
and all my t**th fall out and i have to eat jеll*o
and i don’t care if i get my leg choppеd off
i’ll just train my parrot to fetch me delicious beer from the fridge
and since i’m on a schooner, i’ll drink a schooner
ha ha ha

and i have excellent customer sk!lls
and i’m not sure how that would help on a pirate ship
but i know how to work a cash register
and that would be good for counting doubloons or stolen boot*ay
wish every job paid me in stolen boot*ay

so read my pirate’s resume
read my pirate resume
read my pirate resume
please read my pirate resume
resume

(is that gonna work?)

- b a johnston lyrics

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