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autopsy table - bloody ruckus lyrics

[verse 1: bl**dy ruckus]
as i lay here on this metal bed, trying to figure out how i die
sorry to everyone that was so close to me
life is f*cked up, but just know that i tried
ain’t no way to reappear, but honestly, i have no choice
once you’re dead, you’re gone for good
my body’s so stiff and i’m paranoid
takin’ a scalpal to my head to see what’s hidden deep inside
pullin’ my brain right out my skull to study all my evil mind
sufferin’ memories through death and murder
and torture is somethin’ that i truly live with
the past of a psychopath rockin’ a hockey mask
nothin’ more wild but when i’d given my brother up
grew up a screw up with nothin’ to lose
somethin’ bad [?]
finally gettin’ a spike without my daily medication
they took my stomach out to see the last thing that i ate
pieces of human meat and a cheek from a b*tches face
the look of shock, appeared to know that i was in the wrong
they found the pinky that was chopped off by my brother jon
my chest was open like a book, i could see my reflection in their eyes
it’s a feelin’ that i can’t describe, bein’ on a metal table after i die

[chorus: bl**dy ruckus]
now this is where all of it ends
i will never live life again
on the table like all of my friends
i will never live life again
[verse 2: bl**dy ruckus]
oh sh*t! what’s happenin’?
i’ve been waitin’ for the light to shine on me
but instead i got my heart ripped out and placed in the cooler for it to freeze
set me free like a bear in a trap
finalized a timeline ‘fore they’re gettin’ my story
wishin’ that my baby mama never ignored me
now i’m on a metal table, headed for my glory
i’m so sorry, i’ll admit that everything that i did, i regret
stabbin’ a motherf*cker when i was sixteen
but my mom was asleep, didn’t mean to get her stressed
started gettin’ locked up at a young age
psyche ward for my mental health issues
i refused to turn my life around, but i know that i’ll be missed by my cult crew
takin’ a needle to my skin to sew my body right back up
started from my chest to my stomach
got the return of my organs and put in my guts
they said i died of broken heart, a man without a soul
the feelings of love faded away a long time ago
washin’ the blood away, off of my corpse, i know the water’s cold
they’re gettin’ me ready to send me off to the funeral home
pray for me and hope that i am in a better place
i’d rather suffer now than wait outside of heaven’s gates

[chorus: bl**dy ruckus]
now this is where all of it ends
i will never live life again
on the table like all of my friends
i will never live life again
[verse 3: chuckklez]
we’ve finally reached that chapter but i was afraid that i’ll never f*cking go
decaying and dead and on the topsy table, frozen like ice down to my toes
i cannot move nor could i speak
with my mouth sewn up, so it’s impossible to shriek
when normalcies are gone and everything is out of whack
but it’s paralyzing [stain?] without a chance of coming back
plus there is no body, hoes, to play but my f*cking self
while livin’ a life of a godd*mn lunatic
i’m steady seekin’ help for my mental health
n*ggas don’t know i was a broken child
all alone in his wars, always acted wild
almost committed suicide at the age of seventeen
then became a real monster people said i wouldn’t be
now i’m bl**dy bored with a lifeless corpse
who’s about to be dissected in a city morgue
they begin to cut me open like a hopeless cattle
just a room for my organs with a sharpened scalpal
especially hollow, especially right now that they decided to remove my f*cking brain
stuffed it in a glass jar with the rest of my sh*t
for the entire processes and i felt no pain
all that they can feel is more friend than before
’cause i truly feel sorry, straight deep to the core
for damaging the lives of my parents and my sisters
leaning over me as i reach the cremator
please know that your son has tried
never once, i wanna be the bad guy
who knows where my soul will be held
but i hope it’s up in paradise, floating in the sky

- bloody ruckus lyrics

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