how i got pregnant - cutting room floor lyrics
i read a banned book, i watched the news
i went to a party, i didn’t wear shoes
i touched a girl, i touched a nerve
i touched a boy, i got what i deserve
i drank the kool*aid, i drank the booze
i paid for dinner, i paid my dues
i didn’t get married in my christening dress
i thought about s*x, i thought about s*x
my baby left, my baby stayed
i’m twenty*seven, i’m in seventh grade
i’m in the bas*m*nt, i’m on tv
said i was blind but now i see
i cursed my parents, i cursed the lord
i f*ckеd a ghost on the bathroom floor
i didn’t bleed, i bled like hеll
didn’t plant no seed, didn’t stem no cell
i was a stupid sl*t, i had a phd
i went to third base, got the third degree
my baby’s an anchor, my body’s a boat
my c*nt’s a butler, lemme hang your coat
you can call me monster, call me mom
i birthed an army, i birthed a bomb
i fell down the stairs, i ran into the door
don’t ask what these bruises are down here for
i’m a heap of trash, a precious pearl
the virgin mary, i’m a miracle girl
i didn’t go to church, i didn’t go to church
i made love second, got pregnant first
i’m in the stirrups, center stage
centerfold, i’m the opinion page
i’m radioactive, i’m ready to blow
they say, “look at you, i can see you glow”
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