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battlemuff - footprints in the custard lyrics

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when i was a young warrior, i was feared across the lands
until the time an axe wound turned that boy into a man
overpowered i fought back strong, every blow i did miss
with a beastly yawn meat*flaps opened; i was lost to the abyss

with a vicious gash my honour was sn*tched from me
slaughtered and bathed in spiteful promiscuity

all hail the battlem*ff
there was never a c*nt as tough
from the birth of man to ragnarok
it won’t stop ‘til it’s had your c*ck

when i had sheathed, that leathered scabbard had been used a thousand times
valhalla lay before my eyes full of meat and wine
i prayed to thor to grant me strength, so my wife would not grieve
and with a scream i drove my blade into that bearded meaty sleeve

with the roar of a troll and the howl of fenrir she clenched onto me
and elicited an act that even heimdall should not see

all hail the battlem*ff
there was never a c*nt as tough
from the birth of man to ragnarok
it won’t stop ‘til it’s had your c*ck

all hail the battlem*ff
a thousand c*cks were not enough

all hail the battlem*ff
a wretched beast so co*rs* and rough
the seeds of life are drawn from me
and laid bare for all to see

- footprints in the custard lyrics

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