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soft collapse - helena's son lyrics

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i’ve been talking to the ceiling again
it listens better than you did
every word you carved in my skin
still hums when i try to forgive

i tried to stay soft
but the world got in
every kiss felt like confession
every prayer a little sin

and i don’t wanna fake being okay
but i still smile when i decay
you say it’s healing, i call it disguise
we’re both drowning, just different tides

i breathe in static, spit out gold
pretend i’m younger than i’m old
my heart’s a rusted satellite
still catching ghosts from every fight

if i scream, will it sound like peace
or just another song i’ll never release?
you told me grace was learned in pain
but i’m too tired to play that game

i don’t need saving, i need sp*ce
to find the truth behind my face
the halo bends, it doesn’t shine *
your faith is yours, but this wreck is mine
so i’ll walk alone where silence bleeds
grow flowers out of what i need
it’s not redemption, it’s not regret
it’s just the part you haven’t met

- helenas son lyrics

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