whatever happened to gary cooper? - i’m sorry emil lyrics
constant, always, bashing my skull
grasping, vying, i need control
something awful hijacked my brain
reduced the way i’m able to live
i spend my days trying to regulate
and soothe it away
if it’s not a useless anxiety then it’s misdirected, thoughtless rage
(these words of disease have taken over my…
why do i look for signs that my body wants to fall apart?)
every single day i try but
whys it so hard to be alright?
can’t i just step to the side and
stop fighting my want for life cause
every single day i try but
why is it so hard to be?
it just seems like
everything i see on the big screens
is just out of reach
to me
and i guess
it’s a life of always racking up these debts
unable to curl inward forever
i always took pride
in how stable i was
i’m realising now
that notion was false
and we talk about
“every day is a gift”
but regular life
is picking away at it
do these words come to you a lot?
if i prove them wrong then it’s never…
one thing after the next
it always stirs it never…
every single day i try it’s just the regularness of life
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