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lost in my life and can't figure out where to go... - j_c0b_raps lyrics

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[intro (spoken)]
why is this happening to me?
why do i just feel pain all the time?
maybe i wasn’t meant to be happy in life
i mean, every time i feel an ounce of happiness, something or someone comes along to ruin it all
[clears throat]

[verse]
yeah, i guess that i’m worthless
ever since she died, i lost my purpose
i tried to keep her safe, but she was addicted
to that bottle, drinkin’ was like pushin’ the throttle, since i didn’t save her, i feel like a d*ck, and

i think to myself
that since i didn’t save hеr, i should just k!ll myself
like, she was my еverything, even though we was only friends
she promised me that she’d stay with me until the end!

but now she’s gone and i can’t bring her back
but i always had her back
it’s crazy to think that we could’ve had a chance
to save her life, but it was just a slow dance

to her death, now, i wanna k!ll myself
and i just f*ckin’ hate myself
’cause of all of the pain this brought me, i needed her, but she’s gone now
maybe, i could numb all this pain, just some, how?
could someone live through all of this
how could someone live when life’s never been a bliss
i just took my shot, but i missed
and ever since i lost her, along with some others, i have been p*ssed

’cause it feels like i’ve been forsaken
’cause i’m bored, i’ve been takin’
pills, just to numb my pain
at this point, i’m numb to everythin’

it’s been here so d*mn long, so i’m just super used to this sh*t
and i feel like i shouldn’t be used to this
but i am, and it sucks so d*mn much, i’ve never been okay
since the age of 10, i’ve been feelin’ this pain

now, i can’t live with myself
and every time i vent, they put my feelings on the shelf
i’m so d*mn lost, don’t know when i’ll go
and i hope that very f*ckin’ soon, i know when i’ll go!

[outro (spoken)]
well, maybe not
i don’t think i’ll ever get over all of this pain
i feel like i can’t get over this godd*mn pain, no, i know i can’t
i’m not strong enough to get over it, i need to be stronger, but i’m weak and i’m worthless

- j_c0b_raps lyrics

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