fucksticks [2020 version] - kunt and the gang lyrics
[verse 1]
now, my old grandad had a word
he used when things went wrong
to introduce this word to you
i put it in a song
so every time this word gets used
his memory lives on
i’m about to tell you what it is
so you can sing along
[chorus]
“f*cksticks!”
when nan wouldn’t let him touch her furry pie
“f*cksticks!”
when he got some shrapnel lodged in his j*p’s eye
“f*cksticks!”
when a german sniper shot him in the c*ck
“f*cksticks!”
when he found a lump on his left b*ll*ck
“f*cksticks!”
when me nan died and she left him all alone
“f*cksticks!”
when he let a bogus caller in his home
“f*cksticks!”
when the first black people moved into his street
“f*cksticks!”
when arthritis meant he couldn’t beat his meat
f*cksticks!
mother’s c*nt
f*cksticks!
[verse 2]
so, every time i hear the word
i start to reminisce
i suddenly taste werther’s
and get a faint whiff of p*ss
so, when someone annoys me
or things get on my pip
i think of the moany, racist old c*nt
and really let it rip…
[chorus]
“f*cksticks!”
when i miss an open goal in 5*a*side
“f*cksticks!”
when i lost my hardons, after nan had died
“f*cksticks!”
when the teacher’s told me that i was no good
“f*cksticks!”
when the old bill caught me w*nking in the wood
“f*cksticks!”
when that girl you like turns out to be a nutter
“f*cksticks!”
when your punk hero advertises b*tter
“f*cksticks!”
when michael eavis didn’t want to hire us
“f*cksticks!”
when a gloryhole gives you coronavirus
[bridge]
f*cksticks!
mother’s c*nt!
mother’s c*nt!
mother’s c*nt!
f*cksticks!
mother’s c*nt!
mother’s c*nt!
mother’s c*nt!
f*cksticks!
mother’s c*nt!
mother’s c*nt!
mother’s c*nt!
f*cksticks!
mother’s c*nt!
mother’s c*nt!
f*cksticks!
[chorus]
“f*cksticks!”
when persimmon homes destroyed my garden fence
“f*cksticks!”
and failed to offer any recompense
“f*cksticks!”
when great britain is in lockdown or worse
“f*cksticks!”
when your mother shares a post from britain first
“f*cksticks!”
when you think the country’s heading somewhere sinister
“f*cksticks!”
when somehow boris johnson is prime minister
“f*cksticks!”
when you feel awkward and you don’t know what to say
if you say “f*cksticks! f*cksticks! f*cksticks!”
it makes everything ok
[outro]
f*cksticks!
mother’s c*nt!
mother’s c*nt!
f*cksticks!
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