perils of a troll - lee spitzer lyrics
as a gift i was given away
i had big hair and a racquet with me
i lost touch with my owner and so
everybody’s treating me like a troll
they kidnap me and put me in a car
they ran off after setting the alarm
i couldn’t speak so they gave me a sign
the sign said, “help me i’m not doing fine”
i was minding my own business one day
they came again and they took me away
the stuck me in a bowl of water
after that they put me in the freezer
they gave me a straw so i could breathe free
and to be mean they left me there to freeze
they gave me a sign so i can express
it says, “help me before i freeze to death”
i don’t harm anyone but they harm me
i don’t know why they always torment me
they hold me down and i couldn’t fight back
they pulled out a can and they painted me black
mistreating me seems to be the new norm
they tied me to the oven door so warm
they stuck a sign in my enclosed fist
“please help me before i burn to a crisp”
my owner is going away soon
i really wish i could give them the moon
when they get there they will be reminded
that they left someone behind here
they need not worry for i will prevail
i will send myself to then through the mail
i’ll arrive with a sign at their new home
“help me i do not want to be alone”
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