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kill myself - lyam (fr) lyrics

got a brown old leather jacket and nothing to wear with it
and my weekly bar marathon, for when i feel like dreaming
and some lights that shine through the window in the morning, and outside noise when my nights get boring
and a narrow street that sells out x magasines

got a fridge so loud for my mind to keep writing
and a hundred million thoughts for all the things that i’m missing
and a big sink for when the guests are eating, but i keep on giving them food poisoning
i wish mom was near she would turn on all the warnings

had a sense of living a hard life, and i taught myself how to bend
and it’s everything to me now to know how everything ends
if i was living like a wildcat, now i’m living like a jailed man
if i could scream all my love out, i wouldn’t do it in silence

i got these three little words in my mouth that i use like a poem
i’m somewhat of a new child that’s learning how to say them
without crying and screaming it out loud or using it way out of pocket
i used to hate loving you in your house, now i’d k!ll myself to stay in it

i’m being a grown up, but learning it backwards, was taking me so long
i love you i mean it
i’m taking the hard road with rocks on the pavement the signals were all wrong
i love you i mean it
you stop for a second, and jump from the sofa i thought we would kiss in
we’re not on the same team
you walk me to the door but the trains are all sleeping, i think that we’re stuck here, i loved you i meant it
i run to the kitchen and open a drawer, first knife that i’m finding goes right through my wet skin
you know i don’t blame you, you’re part of the old scheme, of baiting the young boy to bite where there’s nothing
it usually works out, i bleed on your doormat, if you open the door now, i’ll love you i’ll mean it

- lyam fr lyrics

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