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locked door logic - maeve noiré lyrics

i keep my hand on the doorkn*b
but it never turns the way i want it to
every time i try to let somebody in
the hinges freeze up like they already knew
i hear the locks cl!ck tight in my chest
like my heart built its own security
even when i want to open up the room
something in me says, “not safe. not yet. not fully.”

and i get so tired of guarding
places i don’t want to guard at all
but the moment i start to trust someone
the walls rise up, the doors slam shut—
like instinct built the hall

locked door logic, it always kicks in
i shut people out even when i want them in
i don’t mean to hide, it’s just the way i’ve been—
baby, my heart’s a house that won’t let you begin
locked door logic, i push then i pull
wanna give you everything, but fear gets full
every time i try, something closes within—
yeah, i’m fighting my own
locked door logic again

there’s a key under the welcome mat
but i don’t think anyone knows it’s there
i’ve forgotten how to hand it to somebody
without shaking at the weight of the care
i feel the bolts slide into place on their own
like the house is trying to keep me from harm
but safety starts to feel like a prison
when you never let anyone touch your heart
and i wish i could break the habit
wish the hinges didn’t rust so fast
i try to open up slow, one room at a time
but the past always flashes
right before i can ask

i want to hand you the key
let you walk through every room
show you the places i locked up tight
and the love i never let bloom
but the door jams when i reach for it
like it’s scared of what i’ll lose—
baby, it’s not you i’m afraid of
it’s everything i’ve been through

locked door logic, it always kicks in
i shut people out even when i want them in
i don’t mean to hide, it’s just the way i’ve been—
baby, my heart’s a house that won’t let you begin
locked door logic, i push then i pull
wanna give you everything, but fear gets full
i’m trying to change, let somebody in—
yeah, but i’m learning how to
unlock this heart again

- maeve noire lyrics

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