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oh doctor! - malvina reynolds lyrics

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oh, i wish i was a doctor
not a barroom troubadour
i wish i had an office
on the forty*second floor

where ladies in the anteroom
so stylish and so pert
all wait their turn
to tell me where they hurt
oh, doctor, hold my hand

oh, doctor, i ache all over
oh, doctor, you’re so nice
and you give such good advice
i don’t even mind the price
’cause you’re so grand
oh, doctor, hold my hand

oh, doctor, you’re so sweet
with you on call a sickness is a treat
it could be psychosomatic
caused by birdies in my attic
still you make it so dramatic, i expand
oh, doctor, hold my hand

oh, doctor, i’m off my feed
i can hardly eat but three poor meals a day
i’d get back my appetite
if you’d feed me day and night
then i might endure a bite of something bland
oh, doctor, hold my hand
oh, doctor, i’m not well
oh, doctor, i’ve got a fever
it could be a mild infection
that requires an injection
streptomycin’s what i mean, you understand
oh, doctor, hold my hand

oh, doctor, your pills are just too cute
i really don’t know what i’d do without them
some are scented with vanilla
i just keep them on my pilla
or i wear them for a necklace on a band
oh, doctor, hold my hand

oh, doctor, write me a prescription
a little billet*doux from you to me
call me back another day
i get well when i’m away
it’s so boring being healthy, strong and tanned
oh, doctor, hold my hand

oh, doctor, i’m just low
oh, doctor, i need attention
if you think i need diversion
i could take a nice excursion
where the ama convention’s being planned
’cause i love to have a doctor hold my hand

- malvina reynolds lyrics

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