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letter to heaven - merks one lyrics

(they’re are like 4 wrong lyrics, possibly, less or more. please if you know them, fix it <3) dear mum i'm saying how you been? i'm finally doing good, mom. i finally left the scene. i finally stopped living as i lived when i was a teen. and i'm k!lling it with music. mom, i swear you should have seen the live show i did. i was standing on a stage. amazing. people liked the rhymes. i'm writing on a page. but being honest, my mum filled with nothing else but rage. you never got to meet my daughter. so i brought them to your grave. i lost my sh*t a couple times ever since you left. even got locked up and prayed to god for death. i tried to turn my life around and did my best. but it's like the world's against me. mum and i just need a rest. all i want to do is come to you and tell you that you missed. tell you that i love you. hate to say my brother chris say first i lost my mother and then i lost my brother. don't know what the f*ck i did, but it's like god wants me to suffer. yeah, i'm really from the gutter. i was no hope walked home and see my mother crying. cause we're so broke. every time i rhyme i swear to god i feel the spirit. it's like she's right behind me. tryin to help me write these lyrics. maybe i'm just crazy. and i'm hoping for the best. but i ain't jokin i ain't coping with my mum and brother's death i'm worried and i'm scared because my dad's all i got left already. know the day he goes i'll be your mother f*cking mess. why's that? my mother, my brother and my father all gone. got me trippin as i'm sitting, tryin to write this f*cking song. so what i wanna hear you talk about. no f*cking pain. the way i see it, you ain't me. and we will never be the same i lost a bit of time cause i was sitting in a jail every day. the f*cking screws are telling me i got no mail. all i know is how to fail i don't know about success. all i know is how to flow and get this sh*t up off my chest. and a real sh*t straight from the heart. know what i'm sayin? dear. chris. what's happening, big bro? i'm shattered. i know i can't bring you back in that sh*t. i'm shattered. i watched you pack your bags up and then go. brother. i'm sorry. i love you. should have stuck by your ten toes. now it's over, brother. you're gone forever. i can make you a million songs. it isn't gonna get better. i'm looking to the f*cking stars. tryna find my bro. when i found out you died like my f*cking mind was blown i remember screaming as i ran inside the home. like the time i found out mama died over the phone. brother i'm trippin i've had enough of all of the f*cking death. what's god doin taking my family members? there's nothing left. f*ck it, i do. and what the f*ck did they do? why the f*ck do you choose us when you've got lives to take to? i'm trippin. so i sent a letter to heaven just to let them know. whatever i did for this i'm regretting and that i'm sorry. please just f*cking make it all stop. cause i'm not ready to tell my daughters i can't take in the pops. f*ck that. rest in peace. rest in peace. chris. love you heaps!

- merks one lyrics

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