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5 million deaths - newartist lyrics

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yeah
don’t tell me what i’ve been through you don’t know
eyes like the ocean, so hypnotizin’
you left, and it felt like silence risin’
disguised in my scars, i’m bleedin’ deep
someone you can’t believe in, secrets i keep

i stood in the rain, just waitin’ for you
thought love was real, but it wasn’t true
every shadow tells a story i hide
with every heartache, my spirit has tried

i hate myself, i hate my life
wanna end it all, cut through like a knife
if i die today, hope my mom knows
it’s out of spitе, where this pain grows

all i wanted was your lovе, where’d it go?
standing alone, just lost in the flow
these faces around me, so f*cking fake
love feels like chains, and i just can’t break

memories haunt me, i can’t escape
used to dream of a family, now it’s just tape
cut to the end, let’s not pretend
in my dreams, i’ve seen death, just a friend
five million times, i danced with despair
each one a reminder of how much i care
if we’re talkin’ honestly, what’s one more death?
ash in my path, i hold my breath

you don’t know sh*t about the life that i led
if i died right here, it’s my 30th dread
bleedin’ out stories that no one can see
but in this chaos, i’m still just me

wings in my mind, i hope i can find
the love that feels real, not lost in my mind
but till that day comes, my heart won’t rest
just five million deaths, yeah, i’m feeling blessed

all i wanted was your love, where’d it go?
standing alone, just lost in the flow
these faces around me, so f*cking fake
love feels like chains, and i just can’t break

memories haunt me, i can’t escape
used to dream of a family, now it’s just tape
cut to the end, let’s not pretend
in my dreams, i’ve seen death, just a friend
five million times, i danced with despair

- newartist lyrics

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