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hostage situation - proherz lyrics

[verse]
they don’t tell you about the terror
how you’ll count her breathing through the night
check for pulse and temperature
like some amateur coroner
seven pounds of absolute power
over everything you thought was right

[verse]
read about the mercenaries
soldiers who can’t put their weapons down
now i understand the shaking hands
the hyper*vigilance, the constant plans
scanning every room for danger
in this ordinary california town

[chorus]
i’m in a hostage situation
negotiating with a tyrant three months old
she’s got leverage i can’t measure
every finger, every breath’s a treasure
someone this small shouldn’t have
this much control

[verse]
my mother laughed when i called her crying
said “welcome to the permanent fear”
twenty*seven years she’s been catastrophizing
every plane i board, every stranger i’m passing
now i’m standing in her shoes and it’s clear
[chorus]
i’m in a hostage situation
negotiating with a dictator barely two feet tall
she’s got collateral that’s irreplaceable
this kind of ransom isn’t payable
and i’d give everything
if she would just let me fall

[bridge]
they say that love’s supposed to feel like safety
but this feels like standing on a bridge
one hand on the railing
one hand holding everything
that could slip right through the edge

[verse]
so i’ll keep my vigil by her crib
check the locks and memorize the exits
calculate the odds against mortality
practice my theology
and pretend i’m not afraid
of what comes next

- proherz lyrics

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