bugs - ren stedman lyrics
when i was in year four i very proudly told my friends
i was a girl that would grow into a boy. it didn’t make a difference to them
‘cause i liked skateboards, and crushing bugs beneath my feet
and who i was was who i wanted them to see
when i attended secondary despite disguising normally
i didn’t tick the boxes for the race to popularity
the vultures preyed yet teachers praised, the calendar to count down days
and hours just to get on through the week
and while the kids at school continued to destroy me like the bugs i used to crush beneath my feet
with evidence carved into stone and concrete spelling life alone
i retreated to a cave made up of thoughts where i could think all on my own
of ways to k!ll myself than waiting on psychologists to help
the jargon thrown at me made less sense than the thoughts inside my brain
could often scare the living daylights out of me
and though i knew myself and trusted what i said i started arguing
against all of my principles and all that i believed
and while my heart would break with every waking pulse and every beat
just like the bugs i used to crush beneath my feet
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