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dear dad part one - retz hbb lyrics

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(verse 1: retz)
i took years to forgive you but i did it
i took years of our issues but i’m winning
i took years to forgive you but i did it
i took years to forgive you did i do it
i took years to forgive you did i do it i don’t know
sunset drives we eluded a boot
i was facing ten years still i’d do them for you
you’re my dad the one that i’ll be tuning into
you’re the one that i had loved turning black out of blue
then i hit it worse smoking smack in my room
had to watch my mother cry it didn’t matter to you
all the pain that you left swear i’m battered and bruised
but i still see the heart through all thе damage you do
like how could i judge whеn i did that sh*t too
ruby crying on the phones all i hear in the booth
so every time i speak yo i’m telling the truth
i don’t care about opinions you were not in my shoes
and you wouldn’t pick me up when mark nodded a noose
that’s my brother i’m your son what’s he to you
so there ain’t no other options when there’s rock in the room
so there ain’t no other options when there’s rock in the room
i remember back then i was only 17
you’re a grown man i just did what i had seen
weighing up ice swear we hit like every street
but that was out west we were on everly street
within a single call had me cleaning out my closet
with the trust and the belief maybe was wanted maybe get some profit maybe get you off it
turned off all emotions i’m dripping like a faucet
really broke my heart seeing lily get adopted
that’s the type of pain that don’t change when the clock tick
i lost too many siblings now i’m feeling like i’m frosted
weren’t there when i got stabbed you weren’t there for all the losses
really do love you i’m just clearing out my conscience
crying when you hear me through her eyes say it often
i’m just glad we made up before we hit the coffin
slowly getting older so i kinda understand
we never had much now we grew up underhand
you were meant to love me now there’s weapons in my pants
probably why i’m sl*tty she can see how i dance
never let no love in was it you or was it meds
for the place that i grew up in place that you have left
i had to make these songs i don’t harbor no resent
the hardest of my life got me missing out on heads
see that’s where we’re different i shifted all the strength
put it on my back like a b*tch who’s in her bed
ruby’s in my life and girl i always keep you fed
i swear i’ll make you proud till the day of my death

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