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family man - rhett and link lyrics

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i’m tied down, i’m locked up
i don’t make independent decisions but my wife says that i don’t miss it
my old friends, they don’t call
in fact this weekend they’re riding ski-doos while i’m taking my kids to three zoos

but the third zoo isn’t exactly a zoo
it’s a family counselor dressed like a raccoon

i’m a family man, living according to a family plan
i just found somebody’s feces on my hand
i grab a towel that’s monogrammed
’cause i’m a family man

i don’t have a dream job
i bust my b-tt every day from 9 to 5 to finance the dreams of my kids and wife
and my wife has a business idea
she wants to sell these teeny-tiny hats made especially for little baby cats

notice that i didn’t say kitten
my wife says that a baby cat is something different

i’m a family man
we all don’t fit in a sedan
my last child, that sp-wn of satan was unplanned
please cut my vas deferens
i’m a family man
i’m a family man

- rhett and link lyrics

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