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state of change - ruminate lyrics

a tension grows inside me
i feel it every day
it’s when i can’t sleep
or dont know what to say
and it’s this feeling that stops
me from living my life
i know i’ll never break it
i’ve lost the urge to even try

but this darkness i feel is not sadness, it’s apathy.
growing up has taught me not to fear feeling sad, but to fear feeling nothing at all.
see i can deal with the ups and downs in life because they balance each other out, but it’s the flat lines that will kill me.
this place isn’t what makes me happy, it’s the change that brings me hope. now i live in a constant state of change trying desperately to hold on to any hope i have left. but i’m running out of places to go.

and i’m scared to death of what happens
when i have no options left
i’ll just have to keep running
until i am out of breath
i’ll just have to keep running
until i am out of breath
i’ll just have to keep running
until i am out of breath

- ruminate lyrics

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