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regrets - slash fiction lyrics

my body is an instrument that i can’t figure out how to play
i keep fumbling at the chords and all of my strings are frayed
when i look in the mirror, i see my own face
i see the bags under my eyes and start to count up the ways
i would change myself but i’m just so confused and afraid
i think i’m stuck in the middle
i guess i’m lost in the haze

i’ve been attracted to men as long as i can remember
that doesn’t prevent me feeling like an imposter
or feeling like i wasted all my teenage years and early 20s
caving in to compulsory heteros*xuality

i have a lifеtime of regret (lifеtime of regret)
lying to myself’s at the top of the list
i have times when i forget (times when i forget)
that being queer is powerful and that’s what i am

and it has taken some time
to hold my head up with pride
to look myself in the eye
when i come home at night
and i wouldn’t be the man i am
without my friends beside me
and i’ll never repay all of my debt
but i give love back to them with interest
i have a lifetime of regret (lifetime of regret)
lying to myself’s at the top of the list
i have times when i forget (times when i forget)
that being queer is powerful and that’s what i am

being bis*xual used to mean to me
i didn’t think i fit in with anyone
being bis*xual’s just a part of me
and i won’t be ashamed

i have a lifetime of regret (lifetime of regret)
lying to myself’s at the top of the list
i have times when i forget (times when i forget)
that being queer is powerful and that’s what i am

- slash fiction lyrics

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