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i don't want kids - thomas benjamin wild esq lyrics

i’m tired of conversations with my friends and family
about what i think the future holds for my best girl and me
i fully understand exactly what they’re driving at
and unfortunately my answer tends to leave them somewhat flat
unsubtle hints are met with awkwardness
so i feel i am required to confess
i don’t want kids
i just want pets
i can’t foresee that this will be one of my great regrets
your kids are fine
cause they’re not mine
to me a life lived without children sounds divine!
i try to make excuses when folks arrive with their baby
there’s nothing i dread more than someone handing it to me
but declining offers to have them rested on your knee
makes one a pariah within polite society
the room looks round with eyes of pure dismay
and no one will believe it when you say…
i don’t want kids
i just want pets
i can’t foresee that this will be one of my great regrets
your kids are fine
cause they’re not mine
to me a life lived without children sounds divine
i know children can be fun
and yours i’m very fond of, it is true
the advantage is that when i grow weary of their noise
i can direct them back to you
i don’t want kids
i just want pets
i can’t foresee that this will be one of my great regrets
your kids are fine
cause they’re not mine
to me a life lived without children sounds divine
i don’t want kids
i just want pets
i can’t foresee that this will be one of my great regrets
your kids are fine
cause they’re not mine
to me a life lived without children sounds divine

- thomas benjamin wild esq lyrics

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