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it won't be long (intro) - trannie anderson lyrics

motherhood
i pictured it as a cluttered mind in a cluttered house
my time, my energy, and my sense of self
slipping through the cracks and into the crumb*littered sp*ces
between the car seats and the middle console
running on half as much sleep with twice as much being required of me
struggling to climb my mountain of a career
and choosing to add an eight*pound world*sized weight on my shoulders
motherhood
it scared me
then i saw two pink lines in an airbnb bathroom
alone in new mexico on a friday morning
i called my mom
i camе home and i surprised my husband
i felt a door in my hеart open and i walked into a room
full of feelings and colors i never knew i could feel or see
i joyfully carried my first baby
until i met a grief i wouldn’t wish on anyone
no life
no heartbeat
my own life, an idea as of what it meant to be a mother
changed in an instant
motherhood
it’s a privilege gifted by god
it’s a mirror of the father’s deep love for us
it’s little fingers and toes reaching for me, needing me
it’s a rebirth of the heart, what matters
and the lens i view this beautiful life through
babies are blessings
and i still don’t know the half of it
but now, in my fifteenth week of carrying my son, my rainbow baby
it won’t be long before i find out for myself
what the definition of motherhood will really mean to me

- trannie anderson lyrics

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