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halfway // happy - vctms lyrics

blank face, emotionless, anxiety renders me useless
and i’m stuck between a rock and a hard place
six feet deep, feeling guilty over past mistakes
i’m burnt out, the light in my eyes fl!cker
the anger pent up f-cking grows bigger
and i feel comfort in downing this liquor
till i feel it slowly tear up my liver
depression will run its course till i’m dead
till i’m numb enough to know there’s nothing left
a living corpse untill i wait till the end
does it ever get better? no i just pretend

in my head no one else can relate
in my head i don’t see the better days
i’m seeing so many others happy
and all i ever wanted was a taste

happiness never came easy
longed for that feeling believe me
it’s hard to find i’ve been searching my whole life
i come out empty handed every f-cking time
what’s the point? i’m tired of trying
misery is much more inviting
no more hiding, these smiles aren’t sticking
hope is slipping, optimisms f-cking missing

in my head no one else can relate
in my head i don’t see the better days
i’m seeing so many others happy
and all i ever wanted was a taste
the color nothing, i’m deadly dull
lack of serotonin is the result
feeling the steady decline
manic episodes at an all time high

- vctms lyrics

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