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the blowjob machine - weirder al lyrics

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[intro]
i may not be thomas edison
i may not even be a doctor of medicine
but i have an invention that without pretension
will surely change mankind
it’ll help you out if you’re in a bind
doesn’t matter if you’re ugly or fat
or smelly or dumb or blind

[chorus]
why it’s the greatest thing this world’s ever seen!
the bl-wj-b machine

[bridge]
yes sir, just stick your willy in there, flip the lever, and presto!

[chorus]
it’s the greatest thing this world’s ever seen!
the bl-wj-b machine

[verse 1]
albert einstein, tesla, fuller, even old da vinci, have wrestled with creativity, only never to succeed
but mankind’s hope will rest it’s quest at last on account of me

[chorus]
’cause it’s the greatest thing this world’s ever seen!
the bl-wj-b machine

[verse 2]
(how did you invent this astonishment?)
well, i got my creative juices flowing
got an old vacuum and stuck my toe in
precisely adjusted the power of the suck
dropped my towel and holy fuck

[outro]
it’s the greatest thing this world’s ever seen!
the bl-wj-b machine
it’s the greatest thing this world’s ever seen!
the bl-wj-b machine

- weirder al lyrics

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