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the price of peace - xania monet lyrics

[intro]
mm, hey
ooh, ah

[verse 1]
i didn’t leave ’cause i stopped loving them
i left cause i started loving me, and peace don’t always come free
sometimes it costs everything
i used to shrink to keep the peace, bit my tongue, held my breath
let people stay in rooms with me who drained my spirit half to death
i was the glue, the listener, the “you know she’ll understand”
but n0body asked how i was, they just reached out for my hands
i kеpt forgiven silence, еxcuse, and disrespect
calling it just how they are while losing pieces of myself

[chorus 1]
my peace cost me my people, but i ain’t sorry for the bill
had to lose some hearts i held just to learn how to be still
i cried for them in private, even prayed they’d understand
but peace don’t come from holding on
to people who don’t hold your hand
they say, “you’ve changed”, i say, “i healed”
but healing ain’t a place they could stand, so yeah
my peace cost me my people, and that’s the part they’ll never understand
ooh, yeah
[verse 2]
family felt entitled, friends felt overdue
but n0body noticed what staying around them put me through
every time i said “yes” when my soul whispered “no”
i traded my joy just so they wouldn’t go
but peace got louder and god got clear
he said, “if they can’t grow with you, then they can’t stay near”

[chorus 2]
my peace cost me my people, but survival had a cost
i had to grieve the living like somebody i had lost
they still talk in circles, still say i changed too much
but i don’t miss the noise, i don’t miss the clutch
i gave up chaos, i gave up pain
i gave up playing roles in somebody else’s game, so yeah
my peace cost me my people, but peace is how i kept my name, name

[bridge]
i don’t hate them, i just don’t miss begging for love
i don’t miss explaining myself to folks who never heard me
i don’t miss holding sp*ce for people who never held sp*ce for me

[chorus 3]
my peace cost me my people, but i sleep better at night
and i ain’t arguing with energy that don’t deserve my fight
if choosing me, feel selfish, then i guess i finally chose right
’cause i lost the crowd, but i found my light
so if you ask me, “was it worth the tears?,” the quiet, the shift, yes
[outro]
because peace is finally something i didn’t have to beg to live with

- xania monet lyrics

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