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lirik lagu grandma’s mints – alpha massa molester

i just knocked out some homeless man for begging for free food
then the cops came and starting shooting a black dude
ran as fast as i could because i forgot i was white
pulled up to a starbucks then some 14 year old wanted to fight
finally got a girlfriend and i asked to marry her
but then the preschool teacher called me a child predator (what?)
i scammed a black boy after he asked for a job
knocked him out now he works on my farm
he asked for some bananas so i went to kmart
then i had to steal them because i forgot my credit card
some fatass ladywalking around had a they/them pin
i called in my gang then we bashed her skull in
some 10 year old watching said, “mommy i’m scared”
so we shot his grandma up she wasn’t even prepared
looted her dead body and found 50 perc 30s
little jimmy called me a p**py head so i did his ass dirty
pulled up to a playground and abducted 10 2 year olds
got 10 amber alerts guess i’m a wanted criminal
running for my life till the fbi finnally spotted me
pulled a rocket launcher out my ass, n*ggas shouldn’t have messed with me
after i k!lled them all i pulled up to my old middle school
then i blew up a skater kid ’cause he was smoking a juul
saw some flashing lights, now the cia on my ass too
before i started running i ate all the cafeteria food
then they called in an airstrike on me, f*ck these n*ggas doin?
the school was like amber heard’s career, in ruins
i came out without a scratch, b*tch i got blast protection 4
took care of em, now they asking juice if theres room for one more
snuck into a daycare so i could watch the teletubbies
some 4 year old said cocomelon was better so i stole his virginity
snuck into a senior center so i could sell them lottery tickets
after i scammed them all i rigged the place with explosives
50 bodies under my belt n0body wants the smoke
5 billion bounty call me monkey d luffy
jumped another kid after he said he met mr. beast
copped 20 grand so inspent it on the locker
spent the rest on valorant now i got no father
my mom told me to move out so i blew up her house too
i scammed a kid on roblox when he gave his password
stole all his valuables then sold his account on amazon
15 bucks up spent it all on pokémon cards
pulled a vaporeon then i put it in a jar
sold it to some lady thinking it was breast milk
gave it to her child right it front of me
bro was sucking it dry so she asked where i got it
i couldn’t tell her so i said it was my little secret

- alpha massa molester

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