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lirik lagu mcdonald’s vs burger king – epic rap battle parodies

mcdonald’s employee:
the original’s going first, show you why i’m called the mc

you’re just a happy meal and every person will agree

that my sk!ll is supersize, serving mcdouble demise

with this ass*whooping, would you also like some fries?
you ain’t having it your way, i’m the best all around

i have it as my mascot, yet you’re acting like a clown

i’ve won and it just begun, so now i conclude

this mac’s shooting raps at superspeed, like our fast food

burger king employee:
this royal will boil you up with a served up b*tch slap

with my raps i’ll trap and strap you up, like a mcwrap

you’re nothing but my jester! i win by default!

i’ll let my disses touch your fries with those high amounts of salt

so they’ll sting hard and then this magnificеnt king will win

i’m wrestling and putting you right out of the ring

remеmber, i can break you in half, weak as your french fries

just served you royally, because all of my rhymes are king sized

kfc employee:
you think you’re showing off? but instead, you’re just a nugget!
i got perfectness and deliciousness all served in a family bucket!

and you, don’t boast, you can stick that mc up your *rs*hole

you’re only known for being the number 1 cause of high cholesterol

when it comes to destroying low*lives, i’m like a commander

so much sk!ll and class, you could call me colonel sanders

the king is no royal, and i’ll say this to your face, mcdonalds

when people think of pedophiles, people think of ronald

taco bell employee:
keep your unprocessed garbage, it’s none other than taco bell

grind you weak fat b*st*rds and stuff ya in a taco sh*ll

spicy disses coming right up! not that sloppy cr*p you spittin’

an old fart, a rip off, a clown? you’ve got to be kidding!

hey, fry cook, i heard you like when billions serve your grease

my lyrical baja blast will make you all have a brain freeze
this drive*thru boss will make your life a living h*ll

and at the end of this battle, you’ll say “yo quiero taco bell”

subway employee:
freshly wrapped rhymes coming in, k!lling like a verbal grilling

gonna slice all you up, and use you as my next tasty filling

your meat is just fake, n0body wants your cantina

why’d this ding*dong have to go out and give everyone diarrhea

i’m serving bite*sized raps for you to eat, so take a seat

and get on your knees, and suck my footlong meat

mixing and matching this rap, you guys are in for a treat

get over here to stay fresh, just like i was on this beat!

pizza hut employee:
you want a pizza this? can you even handle my flavour?

your rhymes are as cheesy as a burger’s wrapping paper

when kids go to kfc they gain the lb’s

then they turn as black as a burnt mcblt

get your sub*a*way from me, your turkey isn’t even meat

i’m gonna pepperown you, so get off my street!

then add some extra cheese! not the kind you fools cut

here’s your receipt, don’t ever mess with pizza hut!

arby’s employee:
shut your mouth, pizza sl*t, arby’s coming in hard

i’ll cut you like a worker’s finger and i’ll leave you scarred

wendy’s employee:
i’m gonna punch you *square in the face like my patties

i’m livin’ large and healthy, you feed greasy sh*t to fatties

yes, i’m a lady, but i got more b*lls than these guys

stop fingering burgewinging you little curly fry

pizza hut your employees are either hobos or loners

i provide quality burgers, you provide cheap sh*t to stoners

this malicious redhead’s bout to shred you like cheddar

and put you all out of business! “now that’s better!”

five guys employee:
i’m about to knock this chick out with a five*star slam

when you taste our burgers, you’ll be like d*mn d*mn d*mn!

dunkin’ donuts employee:
i’m dunking in, serving fresh donuts & coffee

stop with your five guy orgy and taste my dunkin’ surpreme

when compared to me, you guys are as lame as chex mix

every human knows that i’m the best place to get breakfast

get ready to be creamed when i make you glazed

you all are just munchkins, my rhymes are hot like a latte

my costumers will run on you cause america runs on dunkin!

starbuck’s employee:
you all aren’t comparable, i’m the true star

let me sprinkle this on you, you won’t getting much far

i make sure people don’t get fired, you make people obese

you look like you’re sleepy, here take a sip of these

shove those donut’s up your d*ck dunkin, my coffee’s the best

start making sh*tty fast food, burgers, just like the rest

your food isn’t healthy, it just makes me sick

i’ll give y’all a personal cup, 10 coffees for ‘d*cks’!

a&w employee:
you guys are f*cking scared, are you a chicken (tender)?

and a baby burger? i’ll turn you into a milkshake, get in the blender!

you’ll be toasted in texas * fried, roasted and murdered

i’ll crunch you up like white cheddar cheese curds

been growin strong since 1962! pure american cuisine!

your rhymes are corny like corn dogs! the worst i’ve ever seen!

subway’s sandwiches taste like transfat sh*t!

and i made better chilli dogs than sonic ever did!

applebee’s employee:
?

long john silver’s employee:
?

the rest of your chances of winning has just shrank

so get ready as you’re about walk the plank

sonic’s employee:
?

denny’s employee:
welcome to my den, your bout to feel the wrath of denny’s

once i dominate in this battle you won’t be winning many

my verses are so fresh, you could say i’m going ham

you can call me babe ruth cause i’m king of grand slam

i got more flow then pancake batter

when kids go to kfc they just get fatter

everyone loves my big flap*jackers

the rest your cr*ppy businesses are disasters

popeye’s employee:
?

t.g.i. friday’s employee:
thank god it’s friday, the day i’m dissing you sh*ts

my wings are spicy hot so you better learn to quit

shift on over to fridays employers so we serve you up some drinks that will implore ya

jack*in*the*box employee:
jack*in*the*box here to shut you down like a laptop

all the fast food you serve causes nothing but blood clots

watch my workers flip the burgers as you flip your sh*t on over

hardee’s employee:
it’s hardee’s joining in, the succulent saboteur

my rhymes are burning more than my jalapeño burger

ihop employee:
welcome to ihop, you all are gonna be baked

into our “super” rooty tooty fresh n’ fruity pancakes!

compared to you, ihop is like a birthday party

the only reason you give food is because you can’t get a hardee

ben & jerry’s employee:
we’ve got rhymes as tough as cookie dough, they’ll make ya’ll scream!

and our rhymes have more flow than our melted ice cream

you should ihop away, jack go back in your box!

my ice cream might be cold but my rhymes are hot!

hardie, i’m sure lot’s of immature teens like to visit you

friday f*cker shut up, i’ll cool you with some pop eye soup

chuck e’ cheese employee:
hehehe, my name says it, but i certainly ain’t cheesy

slap yo sh*t with my cheesy greasy pizzaria so dont be needy

red robin employee:
we’re ready to start robbing you of all your glory!

we serve brown meat and pink, but yours will be gory

we’re flyin high, reachin critical acclamation every time

flippin birds like we flip patties, we’re sick when we spit rhymes!

our victory is bottomless, like our bottomless fries!

we satisfy our customers with our monstorous size!

time to deep fry you with this dis, to churn you into chum

go home! you’ve been served by red robin! yumm

red lobster employee:
i’m red lobster b*tch, i’m the king of the seafood regime

i’ll boil you, broil you, and then add some steam

you’ll all need stitches after my pinches

you all will be wishing’ that y’all never went fishin’

i’m cookin hot rhymes! you’re cookin slime! right out the pot

creatin gourmet in the deep sea! see? i own this lot

red robin, i’ll serve some toppings right up to your store steps

i mean business, b*tch! my seafood’s the best you’ll ever get!

white castle employee:
?

hooter’s employee:
we are the true winged heroes, you guys are nothing but felons

we don’t serve fruit here, but we’re packed with melons!

we serve true quality food, you all have no chance

step up your game, and stop touching those little fries in your pants

we make all the boys hoot, because our br**sts are the best

don’t be jealous just because your food is sh*t and our’s is s*x

the only things bigger than my disses are my b00bs

chick*fil*a employee:
fly back to the coop, you hooters, it’s time to pray

so get down on your knees and suck this d*ck*fil*a

all you got is br**sts, but b*tch we got the chicken

and since when do you let women step away from the kitchen?

on the 7th day, i rested, to show these b*tches

i’m their creator and the chicken sandwhich’s!

so now that all you h0m*s*xuals are banned to enter

serving you f*ggots was truly “my pleasure”

dave n’ busters employee:
you all will be dave n’ busted as soon as we start the game

after this battle you’ll all be scared with shame

cracker barrel employee:
?

golden corral employee:
the only thing you’re cracking is everyone’s t**th

reek! what’s that smell? you hiding bodies underneath?

olive garden employee:
?

i’m making the switch, cause when you’re here, you’re my b*tch!

- epic rap battle parodies

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