lirik lagu growing pains – max uh million

i know that i’m not who i used to be
the kid caught catching backpacks
seldom camaraderie

but i get stuck in stupid places
corners of my mind will cave in
i can’t help but fear reality

what does it mean?

i know my friends all like me
and my girlfriend knows i’m trying
and just last year i was dying
and then coming back from death

and i’m back and forth with fig and the band
they don’t let things get out of hand
stop me when i need to catch my breath

am i a mess?

and my van keeps me company
when i find it hard to sleep
[my van is a boat and my boat is a van]

he tells me he’ll keep all the secrets
that i want him to keep
[my van is a boat and my boat is a van]

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