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lirik lagu a letter for god – midknyte

[intro]
dear god, i hope you see this and read it
while i’m about to weep
sorry you to had to see me sweep my emotions deep
under the carpet for my mind to have peace and to everyone to see
i know i have to take a leap for faith and maybe
love the ones i hate
but i think it’s too late
honestly lord, my mind can’t afford to keep thinkin’ these thoughts
i’m bind with him together forever and ever
skin rips like leather
all this mental block
at least she’s in heaven now, with everybody else
i need help
as my mental health, declines i just recline in my chair, and cry until i die because i can’t bear it, it’s not fair it’s wary and scary
like i wanna rewind time and make it fine for like one night
it’s devyn talking not midknyte
but father, why would you do this?
i know i’m not supposed to question you, but i feel stupid
lord, i have faith, don’t get me wrong, but lately i’m questionin’ you
and i feel clueless
i can’t be a man
this sh*t is sad and bad
i don’t have no land to even gather a plan
i want the old dad i had back
can’t be bold can’t have that
(yea!)
[verse 1]
i’m not blamin’ you yahweh, i just need guidance
y’all’s way is silence
and i’m not violent
but if i get on the mic it might turn into a crime and
cryin’ tonight
just know if i die tonight
i must’ve been laced with cyanide
because how the f*ck can i go without a fight?
when you think you see at night, 2 glowin’ pairs of eyes
that’s not 4 fire flies in the sky
that’s me and midknyte
god, how you gonna take everybody and the fam and don’t even say you’re sorry? d*mn
i mean, i try to turn the devils work into god’s creation
i try to make lucifer angry in frustration
someday, no, one day, maybe, it will be a fun day
mayday, put a gun to my brain day, cl!ck it till’ the pain’s away
ayy, i’m not insane, “no wait!”, no way, i will leave today
my fate’s locked up in a sacred cage in a different state
no, stay away
everyday i pray, i just feel like you’re testing me
i feel blessed in bliss, but i feel death is tryna kiss
everyone tryna pesture me
leave me alone
do not disturb, d*n*d on my phone
try to be me for one night, that’s right, you gone
this sh*t don’t feel real
like how motherf*ckers all gonna get the k!ll bill?
not reality
feels like a fallacy in a fantasy
i’m panicking
they all get buried, then they rivals anakin
the pain from my cold veins
staggering and dappin’, and stabbing with daggers
my vision gets more blacker as i black out and
fight loud then i write doubt, i doubt if i’m gonna make it out
of this shroud, that i call my mind that’s mine
tigers build
all the complaints from head that’s already dead
survivors guilt
all this grief from my brain that i achieve with sayin’
“it’s my fault” when i know it isn’t
life called, said it wanted to visit
and now lord i don’t know what i want from you
and maybe that’s one of your angels got the wrong person
everything gets worse and burst into blurts of cursin’ and i go berserk
i’m searchin’ for a different person, that’s me
i don’t wanna be me
but i wanna be me
but i don’t wanna be hurtin’
lord, am i really a burden?
because it’s just been feeling like i’m openin’ the curtains
then get tomatoes thrown at me, grow acne, become ugly
suddenly now everyone is against me
pulled easily, i think i’m minced meat
i miss me
i might have a kind, but dark heart
i think i, don’t know how to perform the dark arts
but i still don’t know how to find light in your words
lord, please don’t make me use a double edge sword
i’m 14, i don’t know how to do it and use it
help me and show me the way because most of the day
i’m lost, a stray going cray, ‘cause i have no money
on f*cking pay day, goin’ f*cking crazy because i have no honey
in the pot or the spot to even try to fix it
after you do that you kick it down and wanna change it
but i solemnly swear in my name on my veins
that i won’t do it again for the game
i changed
i’m sorry, that’s the way it is
so hit me up
[outro]
so hit me up when you get this and send it
it’s so hard to fit this in a letter, better or worse
and now she’s in a he*rs*
pulled the cord, now she’s in heaven
p.s, i love you lord
sincerely, devyn

- midknyte

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